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story.jpg (6217 bytes) The Wench-ell Bodice Dagger

"Okay, let’s get right to the facts. I’m an April Winchell groupie! I absolutely worship her and the legendary radio show she produced here in Los Angeles. I tend to become very sensitive to the goings on in this world… and if you really open your eyes and look around, you start to find VERY LITTLE to laugh about… and it seems to be getting grimmer and grimmer. I hide in my workshop as much as possible, and when I’m crafting knives, I usually have the radio on… to music. I never listen to the news because if I did, I think I would end up using one of my knives on myself rather than making anymore!

However, there was a magnificent ray of sunshine and hope every Saturday night. I’m a bit of carouser… love to play my guitar and sing at “open mike” nights at bars, (you can see me at "Viva's" in Burbank if you're in town!), and I must say, I’m a hell of a dancer… but no matter what was going on I made sure to be in my workshop on those wonderful Saturday nights between 7:00 PM and 10:00 to listen to The April Winchell Show! No matter how many cosmic rotten eggs had been thrown at me throughout the week… three hours of April had me smiling, singing bad country western tunes, and hoping around my workshop like Tom Cruise in “Risky Business” (but not in my underwear… that’s an image that would cause my neighbors to come after me with torches!).

For a long time I wanted to give something back to April for all the joy she had given me… and obviously given a whole grinning crowd of grateful people. 

I know she was and still is, very involved in a wonderful charity, Project Angel Food… and I thought it would be great to make an "April Winchell Limited Edition Knife" and donate a portion of the profits to her favorite cause as a way to say thank you. Well, looking at a photo of April, I could see that she was the quintessential 21st Century Wench… so the very first inspired concept that came to mind was to make a bodice knife… just like the ones real wenches wore between their breasts in medieval times to protect themselves. It didn’t hurt that of all the woman in the world, perhaps no one is more… well, "blessed by nature", shall we say, than April Winchell, to be able to “hold” a bodice knife where God intended bodice knives to be… well... held. (Excuse me, I think I may need to take a cold shower before continuing here!).

Once it was finished, I sent April the custom knife, which I dubbed the “Wench-ell” knife (get it, because she’s a wench… and her name is, you know… and… I’m just saying…). I also had crafted matching sterling silver earrings and a necklace from my own design. After creating this gift, I realized I could keep the “thank you’s” coming by making a Limited Edition of the knife and the jewelry and donate a major portion of the profits to her charity. 

After I sent the knife and jewelry to April, she magnanimously wrote right back with the most wonderful "fan" letter I've ever received. The most terrific part of it was the end where she actually said: "Thank you, Chuck, for all your support and kindness.  You are a wonderful man, and a great artist!"

Yikes! I have received many citations, awards and testimonials in my life, but that e-mail from April means more to me than anything. I have it framed and it is hanging in a very special place in my workshop!

However, as is the case with all great things in the world today, "The April Winchell Show", the most innovative, brilliant radio show ever produced, was cancelled by the rat bastards at Clear Channel and the whores at LA radio station KFI, who have permanent knee pads to the Jackboot Nazi DJ storm troopers who populate their stations... so they were naturally offended by April's irreverent humor. (They are now in the process of digging up the graves of SS officers in Paraguay and getting enough DNA to create new DJ's to do their brown-shirt bidding). Pissed? You bet your sweet ass I'm pissed! I mean, Saturday nights will never be the same again!

It is a loss for me, and for all of Los Angeles, and those around the world who would listen to her show off her website. But not to worry, because:


Yes, you can hear her again, the second and last Friday of every month from 9:00 PM to 12:00AM (PST) on KABC 790AM on the "MR. KABC" show, or if you're not in LA, go to their website, and hear it in "streaming audio" live on Friday nights! I mean, you can't stop a treasured talent like that for long. (By the way, for all the KGB, CIA and Hitler Youth Organizations from Clear Channel, KFI and their bitch of a program director, and whom ever else monitors these kinds of things, this is the opinion of the "knife maker to the stars", so leave April alone, and do what you do best... hang out at school yards making dates with the youngsters!)

That is why this limited edition has an even great importance.. it's not only for a wonderful cause... but is now a homage and tribute to one brave magnificent lady! It's also a great gift for a loved one in your life… that woman who has everything… and for all the “Goth’s” out there… and we know you’re out there, since April loves to read your personals and poetry… I mean… what’s better than dagger earrings and a necklace. Oh, and if only Billy Bob and his ex-wife, what’s-her-name, were still around… I mean… is this perfect or what?! So help a good cause, and get an incredible bargain on my first online one-of-a-kind Limited Editions! If this isn’t more bang for your buck, I don’t know what is!"

Learn more about the amazing April by clicking on her beautiful picture:

                                                                  ©2002-2003 Chuck Stapel

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